"I don't know where I end and he begins," Elena confessed, tears streaming down her face. "I've lost myself completely in this relationship. When Carlos is happy, I'm happy. When he's stressed, I'm stressed. When he needs something, I drop everything to help him. I used to think this meant I was a loving partner, but now I realize I have no idea who I am outside of taking care of him." Elena's story illustrates one of the most common yet misunderstood relationship patterns: codependency. Often disguised as love,...

Many of us find ourselves repeatedly attracting the same type of partner, despite our conscious desire for something different. Often, we're unconsciously drawn to people who carry our shadow—the disowned, unintegrated parts of ourselves. When we're "dating our shadow," we're essentially seeking completion through another person rather than integration within ourselves. While this creates intense attraction initially, it often leads to painful patterns of conflict, disappointment, and repeating cycles....